having very little to do at work, i came across some research on a raw food diet. well, some call it a "raw and living foods diet," which is odd because nearly all the things we eat seem to me to be cut off from their life support, i.e. dead. but everyone seems to love it for its skin-clearing, disease-curing, all-around-good-guy qualities. it might be a good idea to add more fresh produce and stuff to my diet, but i could never, ever give up cooking and baking. but maybe during the day to eat fruits, veggies, and nuts might do me some good. the way i am thinking of doing it is eating a ton of fruit and almond milk for breakfast, a big old salad for lunch, seeds and veggies for snacks, and then a regular dinner with another salad. we'll see.

there was an exciting deadline-driven crisis at work. i cleared it all up in about an hour and a half, but it was the best hour and a half this month. i'm waiting desperately to get paid so i can finish paying off this credit card bill i racked up a couple months ago. and then buy groceries. it's kind of nice to clean out the fridge and then fill it up with fresh groceries.

in other news, i got some animal collective albums and am enjoying them. the new beck album is ok, but i haven't liked his work all too much after midnite vultures.


no food

my review today really couldn't have gone any better. i am rather pleased with the outcome. but the postponement of my doctor's appointment could not have come at a worse time. i really need to go! maybe i'll just self-refer to a psychologist and let this other guy deal with the physical stuff.

we finished the crepes tonight, rendering the house practically foodless. actually, there's plenty of stuff to eat, but it's mostly frozen and/or processed items. the only veggies we have are carrots, onions, and jalapenos. oh, and some brown lettuce. i'd better throw that away... but i need to go to the grocery. it's one of my favorite things to do anyway. we put peanut butter and banana in the last one, and it was GOOD. next time i make those, i'll reserve them for dessert/breakfasty kinds of crepes. or maybe next time i'll add potato and a "cheez" sauce.


bright desserts, dark moods

i have my first performance review tomorrow. i have no reason to be nervous, but i am. maybe i can get some work-from-home flexibility (since everyone is appalled at the length of my commute) or something like that. at the very least i should be able to get more money. it's at 2, so i won't be able to go to pilates tomorrow. bummer. but maybe this will have a similar mood-brightening effect. i'm still terrified. i have a complex.

in other news, well, there isn't much other news. cooking is pretty much the only thing that is even remotely exciting in my life. i made more crepes tonight. they're actually really, really fun to make! plus they're delicious. and easy. and everything else good you could say about them, really. i had to buy chickpea flour to make this particular recipe, but there are plenty of recipes out there for normal people who like to use eggs and dairy. you fry up some crepes, refrigerate them, and when you're ready to eat them, just sautee up your filling (corey likes to broil some chicken and add it to the veggies i make), pour on some sauce, and eat! you can pretty much use the same recipe for sweet crepes or breakfast crepes or blintzes etc. etc.

i can't believe summer is almost over! i celebrated it tonight with a very summery dessert - the much-hyped pound cake.

yet another better-than-terrible food photo. i sliced strawberries and smothered the whole thing with vanilla soy yogurt, which is one of the best things ever.

so i've basically been sad all the time, unmotivated, and extremely irritable for several weeks. i hope the doctor on wednesday can help me. i cry at least once a day for no apparent reason, i feel guilty for everything i've ever done in my life, and i feel worthless, lonely, and no good at anything. never mind the fact that logical evaluation will prove all these things unfounded - it's just how i feel. and it is truly lame. i'd rather not take pills, so i hope he can set me up with a decent therapist who's on my insurance. i'm sick of it, and i'm sure corey is, too. poor thing. he is an excellent guy to put up with me!

saturday is a birthday party with kickball and very likely beer. i've volunteered to make cupcakes. after proposing many flavors to the birthday folks, we've decided on strawberry-filled strawberry, lemon-filled poppyseed, and chocolate (for the less adventurous eaters). i love cupcakes. they're like little gems of confectionery bliss wrapped in an adorable package. i should make them more often. and perhaps i shall.


santa cruz and the rest

so i haven't posted in a while (as though i have dozens of loyal readers), and i apologize for that. friday night and most of saturday, we were in santa cruz. it was pretty nice. we grilled out bison burgers, corn on the cob, and tofu dogs. saturday, we were sitting on the beach drinking some wine, and although the waves were coming up quite close to us, they never made it within five feet. as soon as we flipped over and were no longer facing the waves, one rolled right up and soaked us! we didn't see it coming. the rest of the time we were down there, no other waves came up nearly as high. we got to see some seals and surfers, though. we also saw the dark knight. it was good, but i didn't like it quite as much as batman begins.

when we came back saturday night, an suv was parked in our spot, so we just parked in another spot as there are literally dozens of empty spots in the lot at all times. of course, we chose the one spot in the entire lot that belonged to the biggest retard in the world. never mind the fact that there were at least four empty spots RIGHT NEXT TO his spot. his parking spot was of penultimate importance, so he had us towed! we come out the next morning to no car and the jerk who towed us just being like "well, you parked in my spot." we couldn't help NOT parking in our spot, so we just freaking PICKED ONE! he could have done the same thing! it would have saved everyone a lot of trouble. so we had to ride a progressively smellier bus to a most unsavory part of town (click here and type in "4800 east 12th street" to see) to pick up the car from some guy and at least four vicious, mangy dogs. plus we had to pay $315. it was really lame, but at least now we know to call the manager on any car parked in our spot.

then i spent most of the day cooking and doing laundry. i left my favorite coat at mike's place in santa cruz, so now i must spend a few weeks (at least) without it. we wasted so much time today because of that stupid car incident that i didn't get everything done that i wanted to.

but without further ado, the crepes:

this food photo turned out much better than usual. you can't really see what's inside them, though: sauteed garlic, scallions, green peppers, spinach, mushrooms, zucchini, roasted red peppers, and a jalapeno thrown in for good measure. i also added another delicious sauce that i liked and corey did not - it was quite the creamy, tangy, coriander-y affair.

i also made a pound cake, which will have pictures up here when we eat it properly - with strawberries! i'm also looking forward to eating some tortilla chips with faux sour cream i shall make with the silken tofu left over from making the cake.


i could have written this!

this is a piece that sounds like i could have written it. i always had a secret hatred of people in college whose parents paid for everything, especially the coworkers who would take up valuable shifts, leaving none for me, because they needed money to go binge drinking that weekend. yes, that is just as important - if not more so - than someone's need to pay rent or tuition and buy food. will their parents ever allow them to wake up to the real world and cover their own expenses, or do they expect to remain in a mommy-and-daddy-sponsored limbo until mommy and daddy buy the farm? (yes, my dear brother, i'm talking to you.)

on another note, i was browsing facebook today and noticed that most of the people i knew in high school are married now or engaged. i was practically ms. commitment during high school and a lot of college, always wanting to be in exclusive relationships. and everyone else has up and beat me to the altar! not that it matters. it's just kind of weird.


2 thumbs up, 2 thumbs down

i got la dolce vegan (along with three - yes, count 'em, THREE - other cookbooks) and made a tahini-based sauce outlined in it. i gave it two thumbs up and even smothered some on my faux chik'n patty. corey, on the other hand, gave it two thumbs down. but hey, the guy doesn't like mushrooms, so obviously he has problems. (JOKE) but i didn't take pictures because we were starving and it was hideous to behold anyway.

i was going to make crepes tonight. too bad i didn't realize the batter was supposed to refrigerate overnight. so i couldn't make them, but i think i'll try next week. i just have to remember to make it the night before and then sautee up some veggies the day of. the frustrating thing is i COULD have done it last night - i roasted red peppers to put in them last night. how frustrating. one of those peppers, however, was really good on a sandwich today, and i have faith it will still be good tomorrow.


culinary slam dunks

last night, i cooked probably one of my best meals ever: chile-cornmeal encrusted tofu with southwestern corn pudding (both from veganomicon) and homemade salsa, plus a side of broccoli! corey loved it and called the tofu "probably the best tofu you've made." for lunch today i added some avocado on top, which was also quite good:

i swear to you, it was way better than it looked.

i also made some chocolate chip cookies from the joy of vegan baking. those have also gone down without a hitch so far.

i got a new cookbook today: la dolce vegan. i didn't get a chance to check it out much today, but i'll probably experiment with it this weekend. i also got corey the stuff white people like book as well as feeling better by david burns. someone recommended that book to me, and i hope it helps. i like it so far.


the highest point in the bay area

today we went hiking at mt. tamalpais. it was very hard and time-consuming to get there, but we finally made it, and made it to the top:

if you look really closely, you can see towns and mountains below us:

before all that, i went swimming! i haven't been in, oh, FOREVER. and it made me feel pretty good, even though it was crowded with people who didn't know how to share lanes. but maybe i'm expecting too much.

we went to our favorite thai place and also watched you kill me. both were pretty good. we were famished by the time we got to food, so we pretty much ordered everything we like - soup, rolls, curry, rice, tea, beer - the works. we went to target and couldn't find any spanish courses on cd, so i'll just go with amazon, i suppose. we were exhausted, so we didn't end up doing what i originally wanted to do this weekend, which was explore the nightlife happening right in our backyard.

i sent this blog to people i hoped would read it. are you reading?



i just got back from pilates class. i can't believe i like it so much. i can't believe i like the INSTRUCTOR so much. i'm usually annoyed by really happy people, but the teacher is good. here he is in all his glory:

photo provided by yelp.com.

anyway, he forces you to smile. and even though i'm not a smiley person, i still leave class feeling good.


summer camp

while doing nothing today at work, i came across this. i actually don't remember too much about my camp days. i think that i was the type to enjoy camp at first because it was a new environment and i was away from my parents, suddenly allowing me to do and say all the silly things that were forbidden to me in those days (such as paint my toenails and say the word "butt"). as camp wore on, i became disgruntled. i have always had such a hard time making friends, and camp was no exception. i usually emerged with one or two by the end of the week, but i was never in the "in" crowd or whatever (no matter the setting, it doesn't take more than two days for female cliques to emerge). so i never got picked for this team or that, and i often got really mad at counselors for playing favorites (they all do). so although it was nice to get away from home, by the end of the week i wanted to get away from camp. one exception was my weeklong stint at cyo adventure camp, when i still wasn't quite in the "in" crowd but was just in enough to have a killer time.

tonight we had leftover indian food. the broccoli curry was even better this time! but the naan from this book was rather hard and dry. next time i make naan, rather than shape it into eight different pieces as the recipe suggests, i should roll it out directly onto the pizza stone (thanks, mom!) into one large piece as they do in indian restaurants. and because it will be thinner, then i can cook it for a shorter amount of time so it will be softer but still done.

and yes, we always eat candlelight dinners; we don't have a lamp over by the table.


company dinners

tonight was the big msn shindig after work. it was actually a pretty decent time. but the restaurant was so fancy that entrees were about two bites big and came with poached quail eggs on top and the chef provided us with a shotglass each of complimentary cucumber-mint bisque, which, by the way, wasn't even on the menu. i think that if one is going to pay upwards of $20 for one entree, it had better provide at least two meals. not so here. and there was almost nothing i could eat. i had tomato soup and a side of green beans, so when i got home, i ate my weight in carbs. but in all seriousness, the food was good, and we enjoyed ourselves. for dessert, i had the first glass of port i've had in a while, and i've got to say that stuff is incredible. no photos as i consider it rather crass to take pictures in restaurants.

corey also attended a dinner for his company here.


the new blog

aside from giving me something to do, i've decided to make this blog to let anyone who wants to know find out how i'm doing in the big city, i.e., family, friends from home, and even people who interact with me on a day-to-day basis but don't know what i do on my off time.

so welcome!

today was nothing exciting - except i cooked my first made-from-scratch indian dishes. the naan turned out huge and dense but quite tasty. the curried tofu was dry due to freezing it (note to self: don't freeze tofu and expect it to be usable). but the broccoli curry was outstanding. we could have done with a bit more sauce, though. i didn't decide to make this blog until after dinner, so maybe i'll post photos of the leftovers.